Earth Day

Did I mention I live in the rain forest? Ferns cover the ground under Oak, Madrone, Pine, Redwood, and Birch trees. Spanish moss hangs on many branches. 200 yards from my house in any direction it is the mountainous jungles of the Pacific northwest. On days when it rains steadily for hours, like today, it's easy to sit enclosed in the shack, stoke the fire, and feel that 'man against the elements feeling'. Me against the world. The greatest force on Earth; the 'drive to survive'.
Ok, I concede, it's not exactly Mount Everest here, but I didn't say anything about 'conquering' Nature. I recognize and realize, the best you can do is hold your own. The elements will win in the long run. The beat goes on. Man is just one of the dancers. The song will change.
If one considers the age of the Earth (also the brevity of human history in relation to that age) and current predictions for the future, it is hard not to conclude that man's time will soon be over; even if it takes another 10,000 years. Life on the surface of this planet is very fragile. Ask a crocodile.
Which brings us to Earth Day. The Earth doesn't need any help. 'Man's Survival Day' is what we should be talking about. The Earth will continue to spin for as long as you can contemplate where space ends. The Earth can shed all living matter on it's surface like a dead skin and start over, so let's call it like it is, 'Survival Day'. Man's survival.
Now hear me well: man didn't care in 1970 on the first 22 April 'Earth Day'. Man doesn't care now. As my brother would say, "Save yourself. Mankind don't want to be saved." Man isn't worried about mankind's survival, only his own individual survival. Man's standard of living is more important than mankind's survival. Which brings us to that often asked question, "What will you tell your grandchildren?"
Grandchildren? How about children? How about me? How about everybody? Who ya' gonna call? The effects upon the atmosphere from urbanization and cultivation of the rain-forests, along with the problems of burning fossil fuels and the pollution of mankind's industrialization, have long been documented. I remember reading about them in the 70s.
1970 seems a long time ago compared to the period of knowledge in which we now live. But then too, like now, mankind didn't want to be saved. At least industrialized man didn't want to be saved. He wanted a higher standard of living. The rest of mankind didn't have much to say about it. They just wanted to be industrialized. Those that are now industrialized are not giving up the modern world. The beat goes on. The leastest suffer mostest. The fattest are hungriest.
Long past the realities of mere survival in a small, small, small world, industrialized man lives in the fantasy that he'll fix 'it' when necessary. Kind of like taking up religion when one learns they have a terminal illness; industrialized man stops smoking when he has lung cancer. Gas hits $4 a gallon, and then he buys a smaller truck. People will quit driving when the ice-caps melt and the roads are flooded. Then it'll be motorboats, but the guy behind the wheel won't care if people are drowning in a flood halfway across the world if he doesn't know them. Man don't care about man. Man cares about 'himself'!
The Earth is in charge, however. The earth will fix 'herself'. Man most probably won't survive the process. Which is why I wrote this letter; the beat goes on. Whether or not man shortens his existence or lengthens it a little is inconsequential. What counts is... the last man standing!

Happy rainy day from the jungle!

PS ~ These are exciting times we live in. Check out this UFO !

CNN relates

National news is showing a predator spot, and kill, a group of men in Iraq identified as a mortar team firing on the infamous Green Zone.

Those black hoods didn't seem to matter much when the lights went out. They were identified anyway as DEAD.

I can't feel sorry for the insurgent. Indigenous mortar team being sent to heaven by that hellfire missile. I'm against any group that gets a free ticket to heaven if they die killing Americans, or trying to kill Americans.

We can send them to heaven with God's blessing, because if God is granting them a free ride to make the US their mortal enemy, the

US killing them must be part of the divine plan.

I still enjoy watching those guys have their lights put out.

Now let's get the hell out of there.

Also on national news (CNN) a story from a black college where students interviewed identified themselves as being black Americans, not Americans, in the fashion I discussed in an post a few days ago (Forty Years Ago... 04June08).

I thought everybody was happy? Don't be a Hater-

Where was Homeland Security?

Dammit! Just about the time I'm ready to start my new, dual role in China (English instructor and occidental bad guy in Chinese movies) they let those guys climb the Golden Gate Bridge and hang banners. FREE TIBET.
Fuck! Aren't we the guys who are still trying to free Iraq? Last time I looked black America was still demanding to be free. Something about a society controlled by rich white people. We can't save 80% of the plastic bottles we use, how we gonna save the world? Save Yourself!
The Himalayan Foundation in San Francisco is behind this. I see their commercials late at night on the weather channel. 'Give us money so we can directly give a Tibetan a better life.' Then they funnel money to a Tibetan circus act that climbs the Golden Gate Bridge, hangs banners, snarrels traffic and ruins a lot of timetables on Monday morning in their headquarter city of San Francisco! And your money made a Tibetans life better in a direct fashion; he's at home this morning avoiding the traffic jam on the bridge.
In the end it's really luck of the draw anyway. You lucky, I'm lucky, we're all lucky that somewhere in our heritage we had a conquistador, or a puritan, or a scoundrel, pirate, fugitive, slave etc. that had to break shore and wound up here in America. For some of us our lucked stopped there, but if you're reading this then you're really, really lucky!
Luckier than those people in Tibet. China won't be giving anything away. Luckier than I am. I really am considering a teaching adventure in China, but I've always had trouble minding my business while I ignore what I judge to be wrong. Last thing I need is somebody else stirring the shit.
It was Monday, so don't those motherfuckers have jobs? The circus was off and the high-wire act lit it up. They should have had flight kites to escape, coulda winged it right to Alcatraz. Where the hell was Homeland Security? Were they taking the weekdays off too? Can you imagine the bridge closing down and the people killed in the ensuing road rage riot!
Last week there were two guys on national news being interviewed because, after a series of crimes, they were patrolling their neighborhood dressed as superheroes. There they were with capes, masks, tights... the whole fantasy! Send them down to direct traffic.
Before I forget, isn't the Golden Gate like the biggest target on the West Coast? And were those banners in bags hoisted or carried up the cables? Banners or bombs? Did they know? If they knew, what the fuck up with that? And where the hell was security on that bridge?
I need a job!

Forty Years Ago...

On the day Martin Luther King was Murdered I was playing at Joseph Bonnheim elementary school. I was eleven years old and in sixth grade. I remember the moment because of what the custodian said to me. It was evening on the West Coast and I was riding my bicycle in the hallways. The custodian was washing the concrete sidewalks and listening to the radio. I can't remember for what reason he looked up and felt the need to share the news with me, but I plainly remember what he said " They shot the king of the n******s tonight." I said, "What"? and he repeated it and then went back to work.

I was eleven years old. I think there might have been two black kids in my whole class. I knew one had been acting peculiar: Talking "Black Power" and alienating himself from his childhood friends. I didn't understand the issues. We were children, naive, truly unaware of the Social upheavals of the sixties. I'm not sure Howard Wade understood the issues either, but, rather was acting as he saw other, older blacks acting. Growing up in Colonal Village his whole life also, the son of a career military man, I'm not sure what discrimination Howard suffered as a boy (he was eleven too). He was just another kid in cub scouts. Maybe like Hank Aaron who said everyday of his life, in some small way, someone reminded him he was black, Howard just wanted to be Howard.

Sheltered in the neighborhood, my circle was small and I was happy.

Forty years later I understand the issues of that day, and I also understand this: Although the majority of black Americans are now middle class, despite forty years of social consciousness and legislation to equalify America, Black America still feels discriminated against. Furthermore, if Black voting is the measure, Being Black to blacks is first when it comes to identifying oneself, and identifying with a candidate. The idea is this: Forty years later why Doesn't the term "American" not include so many sects of society in their own minds? And why In the privacy of Black churces at the pulpit, behind closed doors in Black Society, Why is the Sermon of Revolution being preached? And if being Black is first and foremost, isn't civil war inevitable?

It is the same with Hispanic Americans. They are Latinos. They want to speak Spanish. They want their "own " culture and they resist the Necessity of the melting pot.

I am an American. I am a Male. I am fifty one. All of those things come to my mInd before I think "I'm White". And all are inclusive to all Americans. All male Americans can be male. Everybody gets to be their age. I'm not white American, I'm American. You're American? Thats the club, and the club works when we all are American.

But Black American, or Latino, or any other nationality that wants to be American, but doesn't want to get in the pot and melt with the rest of us: Any group that wants to be "Anything" before American is, in my mind, asking to be discriminated against: By the necessity to differentiate themselves they ask to be treated differently and disciminate against others.

This is club America and ALL Americans should be treated equally. Asking to be a certain kind of American only alienates the rest of us, and draws attention to a desire to be Different. Exclusive. And Exclusive goes against the idea of Equality, and thats the idea that makes America great: Everybodys Equal, the same, American. United We Stand. The inverse of that is dangerous to US as a nation. And that is the problem with sects of American society drawing lines to differentate themselves based on race, creed, or color. And religion.

Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could all just be human? Oh, We are. So where do we draw the line before the killing starts?: Drawing lines is dangerous. Better that we be American of { Pick your } Heritage, and emphasize American. But every day this election year America is facing a showdown with a forty year old line that has been erased legally and in the open, but behind closed doors, And in the minds of many, has never been removed. That is why Oprah deserts Hillary. Would Oprah have Backed Obama if he was exactly the same man but white. No! IF he looked white Oprah would be screaming HILLary! Oprah feels the line. And that is why Black Voters Vote Obama, His most important characteristic to accompany being a viable candidate.

Forty years later ......Everything has changed. Nothing has changed. I guess it depends on which side of the line you're on. and that's dangerous. The encouraging news is the line is a lot harder to find in 2008. The bad news is the line is more distinct than ever to those whom are feeling it, yet it seems to be invisible to many. Obviously I can never know what it is to be a Black Man in a society and culture controlled by rich white people. But Oprah, .......I don't understand it, and after everything women have done for her! Bradman

Dogs

My nephew called me today. He said it was about time to bring his dog up here to live, that BooBoo (the dog) had shit on the floor for the third day in a row and he was done with her. I considered whether or not living with two dogs rather than one would make me less lonely. I decided not, so I made my nephew a better offer: I told him the dog could come and live with me if he came too!

On the surface it looks like a selfish offer, I know: I want company. Actually it is a very generous offer when you consider THE TURMOIL OF YOUTH, and that he has to find a new "place" in thirty days

See, I'd have company (probably be tired of his ass in three days, he's always tired of me after 72 hours), but he'd get to keep his dog, and he'd get free rent, and he'd get a stable home for him and his dog, and all without a deposit, first and last, and references. He wouldn't have to falsify income either. He would have to get a job. Remember all those hassles?

I got up today lonely. I'm tired of having nothing to do but work and no one to share my misery with. I've been home two days from Sacramento. I miss many things. Friends. Family. Wife. The weather: Sacramento is a paradise weather-wise. I think one has to live elsewhere from the valley to realize how comfortable it is. I discussed Sacramento with my mother. Her leaving Sacramento after fifty years and moving to Grants Pass was really a return to her home: She grew up on a farm outside of Myrtle Creek, Oregon. She's very happy with her move. I grew up in Sacramento. I'm lonely.

Mom will be eighty years old this July. She's joined the Grants Pass garden club, a church, a widows group. She wants to make friends and have a full life. I am invited to meet people. I decline. I have no interest. I languish in my loneliness and make little effort to resolve the problem. It is not people I miss.

It has been below freezing every night here. I still build a fire every day to take the chill out of the air. There is a lot of work involved when one lives in the mountains. Especially in a cabin that still needs the plumbing and is heated by a wood burning stove. Spring is so wonderful.Summer will be better.

I think about my next move: Should I look for property in the mountains I can pay cash for, then rent a place in Sacramento? or re-invest in the valley and return to the city? or go to China and teach for a while? I'll have to SELL first, and China is out because I have a dog. I can't give Shep up, we're partners!

My nephew's call reminds me of why I moved to the Mountains in the first place: I could no longer afford my home in the city but I absolutely needed a base , a home, stability, a sanctuary with a yard for the dog. It terrified me to think of being a renter while I watched the rest of my assets disappear ( fools and money, I knew I needed to re-invest, quickly). I remember being homeless, money in the bank didn't negate the fears, Those six weeks before I found Happy Camp road were horrid!

Happy Camp road is still all it was before: I realize it's Hell Explained that is making life not worth living...............Google will take you there if you don't understand : It's really a question of here or her. And if it's not her then China may be the answer, in which case this will be a great place to return to. Maybe I should take BooBoo for Shep?

The Danger...

.......I wrote of on Jan. 28 in an E titled, "It's not about race", looms closer on the horizon today. In that e I asked," Will they( Obama supporters) accept a defeat if non-black voters do not support the Senator and then claim, "It's not about race"? It would now appear non-black voters are supporting the Senator in at least enough numbers to give him the nomination.

Now I worry that Senator Obama could win the majority of delegates and the popular vote, and then lose because of the "super delegates", thus, igniting deeply held feelings of racial inequity that would result in rioting and social unrest. Possibly civil war.

IF I was a Black American and Sen. Obama was the popular vote and delegate winner, and then somehow was not the candidate, I would question everything about America . And regardless of the visible, initial reactions, the designation of Hillary Clinton as the Democratic nominee without a clear cut victory would be a devisive disaster for the nation; An alienating action to Black Americans that would set race relations back fifty years.

It's obvious The Clinton campaign is not going to concede. On the contrary, the more the nomination appears to slip from Hillary's hands, the nastier she and Bill become ! Is she enough of a stateswoman to gracefully bow out for the good of the party and the election of a Democrat? HELL NO....... But would the Clintons and the Party pull some political, backdoor, curveball in order to win the nomination for Hillary, even at the expense of the nations race relations? That's what "Florida and Michigan recounts", and "super delegates" sound like, to me. That would be dangerous to the nation as as whole.

An additional danger is if the campaign continues to be ugly and escalates any further then it already should not have, the democrats will weaken themselves to the point McBush could win. Now thats dangerous.

But, when political strategists theorize one candidates supporters will be so turned off by the other candidates nomination that they will not vote, or switch affiliation and vote Republican, I believe it could be much worse: I dare say it, "If Sen.Obama goes into the convention with the most delegates, He damn well better come out the nominee".

Or we can play "Burning down the House". In other words, Black America is supporting Senator Obama in the 90+ percentiles, should by some hook or crook Hillary Clinton get the nomination, and Black America see it as a robbery, I can almost see Oprah throwing Molotav cocktails! After the Gore\2001 robbery and eight years of Bush, I may want to join the revolution. (can't bite the hand that feeds me).

I'll repeat my words of Jan28;

The Obama campaign promises to illustrate how tolerant, mature, evolved, and hypocritical we are as a nation. And I dare say it now: It is about race, and a myriad of other qualities that have nothing to do with race, but, should Senator Obama lose, "race" will then be a major issue. If he wins: History marches on, he's the first, there will be others.

In the coming months, America will learn something about her people: They don't live in a Grey World.

Red state, Blue state, Revealing me and you state.

In the now infamous words of the Reverend Wright, " Hillary Clinton will never know what it's like to be a black man in a society and culture controlled by rich white men." Neither does anybody else whom isn't a black man, I would imagine, BUT, the Reverend seems to know of a frustration, or anger, or power hidden deep within the unsatisfied souls of his delegation. Watch the congregation as they nod and agree with his words.They seem to know what the Reverend is speaking of. These are affluent Blacks whom lack for nothing, yet they share the Reverends feelings. And in the event that Senator Obama should get cheated out of the nomination for President, those feelings will become dangerous. It will be like a war cry to revolt against a society and culture controlled by rich white men.