Flight QYou Never Know who you are going to end up next to on a flight. You could get that talker who really has absolutely nothing to say. They talk of people that they know and think are interesting but are really aren’t, along with a sense of humor that would creep out a priest. I can just see it, he leaves the confessional ‘Thank you Father” the priest takes a moment then lets out a breath and says “Ehh Now there’s a kid I wouldn’t touch”. I totally forget about this part of the trip, it doesn’t hit me until after I take the walk down the corridor. I see my seat and there is no one in the row so far. There are three seats so this means I could very well get the talker and the person who never put soap to skin. Now I play the waiting game.
Your flight partner will determine the type of flight you have. Knowing this fact scares the shit out of me. I’m looking at a 14-hour stint inside this economy-sized coffin. I start to size up every person coming down the aisle. A big guy is headed my way and all I could think is find your seat soon PLEASE! With every aisle he passes I start to accept my fate of an uncomfortable flight. Now he is standing right next to me and pauses. In my mind I let out a NOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Like we all did after we found out sex and the city was in its final season. I’m in for a flight of pasty ass forearm brushing up against me every time he tries to dig himself into a slumber, not to mention the heavy mouth-breathing that is currently occupying the whole left side of my face as he stands next to me. Luckily he was just waiting for someone to put away something in the overhead compartment. A sai of relief comes flowing from my rib cage. I was a new man! We the jury fined Carlos rodriguez… not guilty, he shoots he scores, goooaaaaalll!!!! Oh by the way just a side note this flight has four of the ugliest babies on it. It’s like a reverse baby pageant on this plane. One ugly baby is ok but four at the same place at the same time just aint right. This plane is doomed. Well the flights damn near packed and no partners on this trip. I dig into my pocket for my ipod and that’s when I hear a voice. “Excuse me I’m the window seat over there.”
Before I even get a chance to see the mug shot of the perp that just hijacked my perfect flight. One of the ugly babies lets out a hell cry. It catches my attention as I get up to let the passenger get their window seat. I can hear the beast from a far. I come up on the horizon of the seat in front of me like some rescue chopper coming to the aide of a forest fire that’s way out of control. It’s eyes where on the sides of its gigantic head. The slobber seeping threw the gaps of its half set of teeth. Everything fell silent I stood in fear I stare at the kid and this type of ugly makes the world move in slow motion for me. It lets out this devil like deep roar. It felt like I was in some kind of bad dream. I thought a bear was going to walk on the plane and announce that he will be our captain for this flight, then jump into a seat and turn into a case of beer. Not to disturb the baby beast any further, I slowly eased my way out of its view. The same way you would when you see a dog on a street at night. Back in my seat and upset by what I just witnessed, I try not to look at my new flight mate. My luck they would be the person that has a fear of flying and tell me all about it before take off. Like I need that right now. Just as I get my head straight my thoughts are interrupted by an introduction “Hi I’m Lissett.”
She held out her hand and I stared at it for a bit, still shaken up I mutter out my name. I reach out for her hand. It was so soft that I don’t feel it on contact for the first second or so. She gives me a gentle smile and goes on to ask me the simple inflight questions. I ponder giving her all lies and then living them out right there in my seat. I decide not to for some reason. The moment I realized I liked lissett is when I asked how old she was. She responded just like a teenager would who is about to lie to the opposite sex about their age. “How old are YOU!!!” Lisset was a slender woman with a pecan complexion and rich dark hair. She had a very pleasant beauty to her face, you can tell she never really had any use for make-up. I find out lissett is a Puerto Rican from Lancaster PA, who has been going to school in Sydney for the past 3 years. I explain to her how I’m dreading to see who is going to sit with us. Now we both play the waiting game on edge. We sit cheering every time we see someone find a seat that is not next to us. She tells me when we get to Sydney she and her flat mates will give me a ride to my hostel. As soon as I start to thank her we hear the captain speak. “Everybody. Prepare for take off.”
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