It's On

Forty months ago I left Sacramento. It has been both the slowest forty months of my life, and a blur it went by so fast. Bradland and Southern Oregon have been wonderful experiences. I will love the last forty months always. The change did me well. Others have not been so fortunate. I go through my Rolodex of Sacramento associates and sadly, some of the names belong to people no longer alive. Some I call and only then find out they are no longer alive. Others are retired. By the time I remove outdated cards and numbers, more are discarded than remain. Time is racing by, not only for others but for myself. I look back and ask myself, "are you satisfied?". Yes, I've had a full childhood. Yes, it was all good for me because......it was what it was, the sum total is today, and I'm living it. It didn't kill me so I must be stronger. I hope so. But satisfied, .....No.

Childhood is over. I've been around a lot of blocks. I feel like the luckiest 53 year old in the world. I've been full circle and now, I get to go back and do it again; In 1990 I bought a major fixer for 73,000 dollars around the corner from todays major fixer. Over fifteen years the value of the home skyrocketed. I sold it in 2006 and paid for a long childhood way overdone. I moved to Southern Oregon. Now, four years later, I can afford to return, buy another fixer for less money then in 1990, and do it all over again! It's like magic! You know, "Just think if you could do it all over again and know what you know now." Well I'm going to try. The excitement of it thrills me.

The world as we know it can be destroyed and begin again in five years. In three and a half years at Bradland I have assembled a life and live it. I have re-built an individual. I have reconciled myself to mortality, developed the mind set for tolerance, worked hard to understand myself and take the time to think of others. I have tried to grow up. I have no doubt how well I've done will be put to the test daily in the city.

The mountain is peaceful today.Three days of bad weather has passed and the flag hangs limp on the pole. There is an inch of snow on the ground melting fast . The blue skies that were present when the sun came up have now turned to fog. The serenity is beautiful in it self. The city is so assaulting. People everywhere. Cars everywhere. Rush. Rush. Rush. I imagine we are by-products of our experiences and most comfortable in our accustomed environment. Over three years removed from the city on a daily basis , I now wonder if can return and be happy. Time will tell. I have an accepted offer on the next adventure and Bradland will be signed away in two days. It's on.

The Next Adventure

The rain has been sideways at BRADLAND all day long. The weather says rain for a week. March 28 and the lion of winter has not given into the lamb. When things dry here out I'll be moving. Spring has brought a buyer and opportunity elsewhere. I'm not sure where opportunity elsewhere is yet, but regardless, detention is over. Partner dog and Bradman are out to seek their fortune again. That is if the money actually makes it to the bank.

Our first try to establish a new home will be back in the old neighborhood; Colonial Acres. Prices are starting to bottom out in the valley, and the dog and I have a place in mind right around the corner from the old place. A major fixer we're attempting to buy for less than 25 percent of what we sold for in 2006. The old place, sold for 275,000 in 2006 , sold again this month for 118,000. (Bank owned.) I'm trying to buy around the corner at 60,000.
Crazy how Real-Estate has turned upside down, and with it, the average American is too.. The average American's life savings being their principal residence,...the average American is now being stripped of their wealth. Stripped of it because as mortgages fail prices are driven down. When banks don't negotiate, they drive prices down. When banks don't lend, demand drives prices down. When people don't work, demand again suffers. The snowball is rolling and " The race to the bottom" is on. It's not by accident.
Remember that term? I think politicians were warned not to use it when referring to our current economic woes . It disappeared in the media. No sense in alarming people and setting the dogs on the politicians.
"The race to the bottom" refers to the reduction of the American standard of living until it equates more with the world standard of living. That's the masterplan. Evident everyday. Free trade; overseas operators; outsourcing to cheap labor markets; everything made in China; import, import, import; all of that means competition to the American worker and their standard of living.
Our "race to the bottom" is happening. It's been arranged by our leaders. It will be carried out over time. We should "God Bless" them as they hang from ropes, the Bastards.
Regardless, it is the reality. Knowing this, and knowing the average Chinese can't afford American real estate, Know property prices aren't going anywhere soon except to continue the race. That idea makes it hard to buy property. How long will it take to reduce the American middle class to peasantry?
America wake up, our present policies fall to conveniently in line with the bankrupting of a nation and world control by money. Being a world citizen means being a world peasant . We are not going to raise the average American's standard of living by sharing our wealth with the world. Maybe the next adventure should be to China to research where America is going?
A man needs a Garage though, so here is my first candidate after emancipation from the mountain. Everybody... let's hope like hell don't exist real estate rebounds ten days after they accept my offer.

Fire and Ice

Yesterday the history channel did a marathon showing of "How the Earth was made". Today there is a volcano erupting in Iceland. The volcano is spewing lava that threatens to melt a nearby glacier. The whole area is white with ice and snow except the crack in the ground glowing bright red and spitting hell. Video is terrific. Fire and Ice, and the natural awe of humbling oneself to the evolution of the world. (That thought could extend to include the Galaxy , but beyond this surface layer of land floating on fireball Earth, I don't think there's much out in space that cares.)
My point isn't we're alone, or that this is the only inhabitable piece of hardened rock in space, though it is somewhat related. My thought is humbling oneself to the evolution of the Earth.
Studying the geological history and formation of the Earth, it's evident cataclysmic change could come in an instant, in many forms, and has previously. Long term change is inevitable, is no less dangerous in it's moments, and creates catastrophe like no other force we know. That volcano in Iceland is bothering me.
According to the show, the world came out of the last Ice Age about 13,000 years ago. Astrologically speaking, about half way around the procession of the zodiac. Opposite of where we will be 122112. It was the last Ice age, too. The world has been slipping in and out of Ice ages for the last million years. That means "global warming" has also been occuring off and on for a million years. Which of course leads me to speculate if Ice ages occur and melt on 26,000 year cycles. I don't worry about another Ice age. 26,000 year cycles are a long time in human terms. The volcano in Iceland bothers me.
Volcanoes are a reminder that Life is an anomaly. An aside. A fragile miracle of circumstance at the mercy of elements it doesn't control. Perhaps the center of the Universe in consciousness, but in terms of the big picture, life is simply algae on the surface . The rest of the Universe has no conscious, or life for that matter. One stray, conscious-less rock could hit the place and put conscious to rest forever. One conscious-less meteorite returning the Universe to the norm.
Volcanoes are the norm. Volcanoes are reality. They are prevalent throughout earth and space. Show me a burning ball of rock where the surface has cooled, I'll show you volcanoes. We are as helpless to their power, as we are to that of the Universe, as the dinosaurs were when the last rock changed the face of "consciousness". Volcanoes are a reminder that the earth is no more inhabitable than any other burning ball of rock in the universe, spitting fire and poisonous gasses, except for atop it's thin hardened layer of mantle, and only if it doesn't spit too much.
Let's hope that more volcanoes don't come to life in the near future. That could indicate the world needs to burp on a large scale and that could not be good for mankind.

Brazil

That's right , I was thinking about going to China but the Olympics are over and why experience Bei Jing in the smog? Then I was watching "Nature's Deadliest- Brazil" and now I have decided I'm not leaving my shack. And I am never going to Brazil !
Certain Caterpillars can kill you in Brazil. You step on an Assassin caterpillar, little fuzzy looking thing, it pumps the most lethal caterpillar poison in the world into you and 15 hours later you're dead.
In Brazil there are over two hundred sub-species of the Poison Dart Frog. Named so because the natives will rub their darts on a frog's back to make the darts poisonous. Handling the frog with a cut on your hand would kill you. About three minutes after the poison was introduced to your system. No antidote.
Brazil is where the Anaconda hangs out. I didn't know the Anaconda has six rows of teeth that it uses to set as an anchor from which point it squeezes it's victim to death . Ugly. So were the poisonous snakes. The Jararaca and the Bushmaster.Then there is the Wandering spider. The most poisonous spider in the world. It likes to hide in bananas and go anywhere it can. It looks like a Tarantula. In the Wandering spider's depiction, they show a man spotting one on the floor of his home, when he tries to strike it with a broom and misses, the Wandering spider aggressively runs up the handle and bites him .The spider does not back down. Mess with it, it comes and gets you. 3 minutes later, death. No open markets for me, thank you.
In Brazil there are crocodiles, scorpions, killerbees. There are also Cone snails. If you saw one on the beach you would want to pick it up; Such a pretty shell. The Cone Snail has a stinger that will sense when your hand is in range of the opening and sting you. One drop of it's poison will kill twenty people. There is no cure or antidote . A good portion of people stung die immediately from pain.
In the evergreen Jungle I live in, It's much safer. I think I'll stay home. If I go to the ocean, I'll go to Brookings and avoid the scorpions.

On Vices

I like to say, "Your vices catch you in your fifties and kill you in your sixties". I don't know from where that little witticism came. It might be original. Probably not. It's hard to think much that's said, hasn't been said before. ( Huh, John Lennon?) Or maybe my brother has repeated it in front of me. He tends to spout these "phrases of knowledge" quite often. He likes to sound wise by applying them whenever he can. I'm of the opinion he guides his logic-life by them. He likes to say, "Every man must measure his own greed", or "Save yourself, the world don't want to be saved'. Things like that. As if every man is the same and the witticisms he spouts apply to all. Condescending ass, ....a lot like me.
You know there's only two types of asses in the world: Those of us whom know it, and the real asses whom don't. I might be both.
Back to "Your vices catch you in your fifties and kill you in your sixties". Time to heed my own words and save my life. At least long enough to make some sort of last minute, midnight hour contribution to mankind. If possible. I'm 53 closing fast on 54. I have one Vice left in my life. I Quit smoking, snorting, gambling. I still cuss. I'm still loud. I ain't perfect but it don't seem to affect my health, so it's finally down to Cannabis. ( I am totally disregarding dietary considerations , of course) The last test of my desire for a healthier, saner life; Discontinuing the inhalation of Cannabis smoke.
Therefore it is incredibly unfortunate that I live smack dab in the middle of The State of Jefferson where inhaling Cannabis smoke is the custom and culture. Where growing the Cannabis to burn to inhale is the industry and economy of the area. Where the reggae band at the 4th of July Bash in Takilma throws joints to the dancers, and the tea served is made with mushrooms. Changing lifestyles here at the midnight hour will be a true test of desire...
My day is over. Only dissection can tell the damage done. "Any damn fool can quit when he's losing". That almost sounds like I think I came out ahead on the deal; I didn't. Very few of us get away without paying the price for our mistakes. Regardless, it's time to discard the final vices of my life and see if I've reined myself in in time ...while I can still breathe.
When I quit smoking16 years ago, I simply decided cigarettes were killing me. Stop or die. Easy choice and so was stopping. You don't do anything to stop smoking. It's harder to smoke; got to buy them , light them, etc., Stopping, piece of cake; Do nothing. Drugs were harder. I had to be miserable, barely surviving, digging out of the mud and re-building my world to remember what was important. I had to re-learn joy. It was necessary to go from over-sparked to no-spark so I could find natural spark. Thus' "Life is wonderful, Every miserable moment." ( Aren't you loving all these Franklin-ish antedotes ?) (Can antedote be used like this?)(Where's an attorney with an english degree when you need one?)
Alas, as much as I have enjoyed being an outlaw, As much as I have enjoyed inhaling the smoke of Cannabis, as much as I have enjoyed living in the State of Jefferson, I fear if I don't leave soon I may never get away from being young forever. Which means I won't live to a ripe old age. (105) Time to start drinking Wine.
No, I'll be keeping what's left of my stash in case I get flaky and change my mind, or fall off the wagon. These bouts of resolve normally only last until my cough disappears. Yet, time to heed my words...
I tell people all the time, "Your vices catch you in your fifties and kill you in your sixties", they look at me like, "Save yourself ...asshole". Obviously, the world don't want to be saved. Save Yourself.
It is Spring today. Winter ended this morning. Life is wonderful, every miserable moment.

Snow in March

The sky lightens behind the ridge across from the cabin, revealing a landscape covered with snow from a late winter's storm. At this point of the morning the world has no color; Everything is a black outline or a shade of gray. Outside it's silent, motionless, a black and white photo of the moment.
The undersides of the clouds turn pink as the sun rises a little higher and begins to bring the color out of the day. Here and there is a little blue sky. The colors emerging, soft blue and pink pastels make me think this day will start in winter and end in spring.
Direct sunlight begins to hit the snow covered mountainside and the world becomes blinding in it's brightness. The flag hangs limp. The sky is blue. The green of the trees begins to show as the snow melts and slides off their needles. Soon the wood-burning stove will be overheating the house. The dog wants to go outside. I can take off my indoor coat.
The snow on the ground must make it more difficult for the birds. I can see them beginning to loiter outside the Octoberfest room hoping for bread crumbs. The Blue Jays come to my whistle in the morning. They're part of my A.M. entertainment. One screech from me and they know it's feeding time. Days like today I can hardly return inside from throwing bread crumbs on the ground, get my coffee, and sit down to watch the show before the bread is all gone.
It will be muddy on the mountain today. Melting snow. There will be rain later in the week , too, and more mud, but it will be a Spring rain, warm, full of promise, and intermittent. My fourth winter at Bradland is ending. More comfortable this year than the previous three, better fed, happier, I will miss the rain and cold as the year progresses through the warm seasons. There is something to be said for cozy, warm, familiar and comfortable. This winter I was all of those.
Forty months into this adventure, the struggle is over. Survival no longer dominates my life. All of the comforts of the modern world are here at Bradland. It is now time to sell, no matter what the cost, OR find some way to entertain myself. The time may be ripe to learn "Chainsaw Carving" and start my masterpiece and gift to the world; A mountainside of tree carvings , totem poles, faces on trunks, and other eccentricities in wood. Got to do something. How about poetry from 1978?

Young men work 'til they're old and gray,
Few will ever get far,
At sixty five they can take a break,
and wonder who they are,
until spirit from body goes astray,
time has left it's scar.

The sun goes down at the end of the day,
not caring where you are,
the moon will shine it's own special way,
reflections of a star.

In a day and age when the hearts of men can easily be bought,
Soldiers fight without hope to win,
and me, I'd rather not,
go to a war to see my end,
that needlessly be fought.

The sun will rise to lend the heat
the cold of night has sought,
The moon may hide to rise again,
the day will soon be hot.

The world revolves with it's unworthy guests,
whom only stop to drink,
the milk of the land without thought for the mess,
they leave behind to stink.
Existence and life, a perpetual test,
and it makes me stop and think,
Where should a man put his time to invest,
and what are true instincts?

The sea opens up to the sun in the west,
as it settles with a wink,
the moon soon shines high aloft in it's nest,
enhanced by rings of pink.